What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

How many of you have had your parental rights taken away because of lies and no truth whatsoever, and did you prove the lies that were told about you to be false either through drug testing or another way, but still had your rights taken?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

What are the easiest stores for shoplifting?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

When reading can – and can't – help with mental health - BBC

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why do flat-earth conspiracy theorists believe that photos from space, including those of satellites, are fake?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why do flat Earthers run away like whipped dogs with their tails between their legs when asked simple questions that expose their delusions as fantasy?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why am I sweating so much when I try to do anything?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

TEXT:

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

All New GTA Online Vehicles In Money Fronts Update And Prices Revealed - RockstarINTEL

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Why would calling me an incel help anything? How does that solve anything? Why can’t you actually be helpful and offer productive honest advice?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Do people have to be a pastor to baptize?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

What happened to your school bully?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.